CBS bans porn site’s safe-for-work Super Bowl ad
It’s “Big Game” time (since apparently combining the words Super and Bowl is a trademark no-no) and, like every year, we’ll be seeing a slew of new commercials gracing our flat-screens on Sunday. One commercial you won’t be seeing is a spot for PornHub.com, one of the internet’s largest porn tube sites. CBS reportedly rejected a proposed multimillion dollar commercial from the site in a grandiose display of shameful hypocrisy. Why is it so hypocritical, you might ask? I’ll explain.
Everyone knows that Super Bowl commercials are the most highly coveted of all TV ads and they’re usually the talk of the town after they air. From the Budweiser frogs to Apple’s 1984 to the hugely popular VW Vader commercial, these ads can become a part of pop culture.
PornHub’s rejected spot was not only safe for work, it was also funny, drawing attention to the G-rated means of advertising an X-rated subject. Take a look at the ad here:
An older couple sits on a bench, silently, contently looking out over a park while sentimental music plays in the background. Twenty seconds of sugary bliss, until the supposedly offensive part: a simple, plain, brand logo for PornHub. It seems that the very words “PornHub” are so grossly horrifying that they should not be allowed to be viewed by all the innocent eyes glued to the TV during the game.
I call bullshit!
Let’s take a look at some other Super Bowl commercials, shall we? Here’s a quick video with some of the most recent sexy Super Bowl ads:
Scantily-clad babes, cavernous cleavage and just about every square inch of Adriana Lima were completely fit for air, but not two old people on a bench?
I’d like to take a moment to talk about one ad, or rather one company, in particular. GoDaddy. Let’s take a look at their “Cloud” commercial.
Oft-exploited spokeswoman Danica Patrick appears with the Pussycat Dolls to flirt with two nerds and shoot light from her boobs in an a commercial that’s somehow supposed to advertise the sleazy .com distributor’s new cloud services. Yes, cloud services. That’s what you take away from this commercial.
Let’s face it, the GoDaddy commercials are like porn anyway—crappy, tacky porn with no money shot, but porn none the less. Just like no one goes to Hooters for wings, no one says, “I can’t wait to see that GoDaddy commercial so I can learn about their e-commerce options for my web hosting package.” CBS claims they rejected the ad because they don’t permit “advertising related to pornography” but the GoDaddy ads are borderline pornography all by themselves.
PornHub is clearly emerging as the winner here because they’re getting enough free publicity from this to make up for a dozen Super Bowl ads, and they’re revealing CBS’ ridiculousness to the world.
CBS might not allow PornHub and similar companies to air ads this year, maybe not next year either, but eventually the almighty dollar will win out and they’ll cave, which will probably lead to better ads anyway. At least the porn companies can produce something humorous and clever!
