Greg’s answers to the Trashwire Survey

What is your favorite bad movie?
I have to go with “Showgirls”. I was leaning towards “Mommie Dearest”, but really that movie is too cool to be bad. “Showgirls” has it all: bad acting, bad writing, bad cinematography, bad choreography, bad costumes, bad makeup, bad lighting, bad soundtrack, bad direction, bad screenplay, bad marketing, and (I assume) bad catering.

What is the best line from a bad movie?
“Well, excuse me for still believing in Sunday walks in the park and little babies!” Anna Nicole Smith in Skyscaper

Who is your favorite bad movie star?
Mariah Carey in Glitter. She is just so horribly boring that it can make your teeth go numb. This was a tough call, because Ms. Berkley is energetically horrible in Showgirls, and Anna Nicole is medicatedly horrible in Skyscraper. But Mariah wins because she actually seems to be trying but fails so miserably.

What is your favorite trashy reality TV show?
Although I couldn’t watch more than three episodes before I wanted to commit myself to a sanitarium, it has to be “Being Bobby Brown”. Watching Whitney Houston allow herself to be filmed as the crack whore she really is left my jaw agape for many an hour.

Who is the funniest person alive?
Kathy Griffin. I saw her live and almost peed my pants.

The first thing I’d do with a billion dollars is…?
Buy up all the available property in some horrid little redneck Christian town and give it free of charge to drag queens, atheists, lesbians, and gays. They could take over the school board, the city council, and all of the social organizations and pass legislation requiring sexual deviance and/or cross-dressing.

If I was stranded on an island with one celebrity I?d choose…?
Fran Lebowitz. I know she’s not really a celebrity, and I know no one has heard of her, but she’s really smart and witty and that’s all that counts.

If I could only hear one song for the rest of my life, I’d listen to…?
“Better The Devil You Know” by Steps. It’s my happy song.

My best movie experience was…?
Seeing “The Room” for the first time with Alexis. To call me “stunned” is an understatement.

When I was little, I always wanted to be a…?
Backup Dancer. How lame is that?

Which one is better:
Coke or Pepsi?………. Vodka.
Chris Rock or Dave Chappelle?………. Is he that funny black guy?
South Park or Family Guy?………. South Park. I have never understood Family Guy.
Mac or Windows?………. Sadly, Windows
Facebook or MySpace?………. Oh, you youngsters and your new-fangled ideas!.
Movies or TV?………. A book.