I’ve never been so horrified by television in my entire life. On tonight’s episode of I Love New York, the arrogance level was cranked up to eleven like something out of Spinal Tap. Not only did we have to hear delusional ranting from New York and her horrible mother, but they were joined by special guest star, Omarosa.
I feel like my brain was just raped. I’m only about half way through the episode right now, and frankly, I don’t know if I can even finish it. Watching Omarosa is where I draw the line between so good it’s bad and just plain horrifying.
The guys were asked to do a presentation of their financial status, because apparently New York has no respectable qualities of her own and enjoys being a total gold digger. Mentally unstable contestant Pootie gave a strangely animated presentation, shouting about how he is completely broke. He then left the room, burst into tears, and supposedly threw himself down a flight of stairs. See what happens when you’re in the same room as New York, her mother, and Omarosa?!
Freakishly greasy and obviously gay contender T-Weed claimed to be worth $100 million, so naturally he won the challenge and was picked to go on a private date with New York. During their dinner, he went on and on about his alleged business ventures as New York sat on, bored that the conversation wasn’t all about her.
When New York returned home from her date, her mother came to her to tell her that she was concerned that Pootie was completely psychotic and posed a potential threat to everyone in the house. Later, Tango also approached New York to discuss Pootie’s outbursts. Everyone feigned concern as Pootie said he was going to leave the show and seek mental help. He took off and it was on with the show.
Some highlights:
12-Pack drank a live bee in a glass out in the back yard. Yeah, that’s right, he drank a live bee.
New York looked even more like Jay-Z with a wig on than she usually does as she lounged in the back yard.
Mr. Boston gave New York a uncoordinated white boy lap dance.
New York got in the hot tub with a bunch of the guys, where she was passed around like a doobie and ended up looking like an even bigger whore than normal.
At the chain ceremony, T-Weed was outed… no, not that way, but for being a fraud. New York had a copy of his credit report, which revealed his credit score was a resoundingly low 523, he has no credit cards and his last job was at Munchies Pizza Parlor. The look on his face was pretty priceless as he stammered to explain and tried to pretend that it wasn’t really his report. Nonetheless, he was cut from the competition. Bonez was also eliminated because New York claimed that she was worried she would corrupt his solid morals if he stayed.
Right now, I’m predicting that Chance will make it to second place, but that Mr. Boston will win the show. They just keep showing him and hinting to how much New York and her mom like him, but doing it in a subtly enough way that it isn’t too obvious. Mark my words, Trashwire readers, Mr. Boston will be the last man standing on I Love New York.
Why is Omarosa still on tv? Wasn’t her 15 minutes over about five years ago?