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The Great Whore Off
You know it’s gotten bad when Chaotic was the best you’ve looked in years. Remember when Chaotic, Britney and Kevin’s “home movie” reality show, aired on TV and we all thought “Wow! Britney is a dumb, trashy, skank!”? Well that was only an appetizer for the skanky trash display we were about to see. Britney continues to amaze me because, every single time she seems to have hit rock bottom in her life and I’m certain her career is over, she discovers an entirely new low point. I remember watching Chaotic and thinking, “I’m shocked her people let her release this because it makes her look like a bumbling moron who is getting played so hard by Kevin Federline.” It was true. She looked totally ignorant. Kevin looked like those white kids … Read entire article »
Filed under: Celebrities
Why Trashwire loved Anna Nicole Smith
Yesterday, the world of bad movies lost a major player when buxom blonde b-movie bombshell Anna Nicole Smith passed away in her hotel room in Florida. She will be remembered by Trashwire, not only for her performance in bad movie classics like the infamous Skyscraper, but also for her classic trashy reality show The Anna Nicole Show. Her body of work brought us fantastic bad movie quotes like everyone’s favorite line from Skyscraper, “Well excuse me for still believing in Sunday walks in the park and little babies.” Her reality show also introduced us to other pop culture d-list figures like her designer Bobby Trendy or her homely assistant Kimmy. The show even spawned parodies on shows like SNL, which summarized the first episode in an animated “TV Funhouse” clip showing … Read entire article »
Filed under: Celebrities
Mooninites invade Earth, panic Boston
And so it has come to this. A marketing campaign for a cartoon has supposedly “panicked” a city. Namely, Boston. As far as I can tell, no Bostonians were running up and down the street, arms in the air, hair in disarray. shrieking “Oh, Why? Oh Why God? Why Me?”. It is obvious from all reports that the only people who felt “panic” were City Officials who overreacted. This is why the terrorists have won. We are scared of advertising devices made up of lite-brites and batteries. I have seriously had it. They have actually arrested some poor slob who was hired to place these little marketing gimmicks around Boston. This is it guys. Anyone up for our own island in the Caribbean? I’m reading all of the articles about this pretend bomb scare/terrorist … Read entire article »
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