Why I’m not talking about Paris Hilton

A few of our readers have asked me why we’re not covering the entire Paris Hilton prison fiasco. We are trashwire and she is such an icon of trash in our culture, it seems crazy that we’ve barely mentioned it.

The reason is simple. I can’t stand her and I refuse to participate in all the hype, gossip, and attention that she thrives on. I wish there was a way to just click my heels together and say, “I do not believe in Paris Hilton, I do not believe in Paris Hilton” until she simply vanished into thin air.

Girls like Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears are trashy, but used to have careers. Britney was a pop star once. Lindsay was an actress. Paris, on the other hand, has done nothing, achieved nothing, and contributed absolutely nothing to society as a whole. At least Anna Nicole Smith was interesting to watch. Paris is, as Trey Parker once said, “Just a stupid, spoiled whore.”

I feel like we’re at a crucial point right now as a society. We have the choice to put a stop to all of this, or to just let her keep on being famous. I’m really hoping it all plays out like this:

Maybe if we all just ignore her, she’ll just go away.