Please tell me this isn’t true

VH1 had this posted on their blog today:

Yes, Britney Spears acts totally, effing insane. But it’s not that’s she’s crazy – it’s because she’s pregnant! Again!

If this is true, it could mark the start of the apocalypse. They went on to say:

According to numerous tabloids, Britney’s been lugging around baby #3 for four weeks. Apparently Brit even emailed around a pic of the ultrasound last week (she knows how to email?) and the rumored father of her baby, producer J.R. Rotem, has supposedly confirmed the news (er, he probably confirmed it by leaving the country).

Looks like another Spears spawn will be entering a world of caring parents and kid-safe living… oh, wait, I mean, they WON’T be doing that at all. VH1 claims:

But a baby isn’t going to like growing up in Chez Britney, where she supposedly changes her kids’ diapers on the same white couch that she lets her little dog poop all over (we are not making this up). And if her new baby needs a pacifier, it can just suck on one of the sex toys Brit keeps in the “large, covered candy dish on the living room table.”

Yes, Britney’s house is such a great environment for kids that:

She even has a “double-locked fantasy room” that a source says is “filled with sex toys, from ticklers, whips and chains to fur-trimmed handcuffs hanging from the metal bedframe.” Sounds like it’ll make a great nursery!

This continuing saga of Britney Spears just keeps getting better…. what a classy lady.